Tuesday, January 14, 2014

From an "intimidating woman" to a brotha: what he may not know.

these are personal insights, and may not apply Generally to all women classified as "intimidating"

1) I don't understand realistically why a man would be intimidated by me.  I cannot bench press anything significant, I don't have a john or cojones, we aren't competing for facial hair, and I can't shoot hoops. What of my femininity should intimidate? I have dated shorter men, those who didn't go to college, had a blue collar job, were balding, were skinny, dorky, foreign, and the list goes on. At the end of the day, if a guy is intimidated by me, that may say more about him than it does about me. I just saw a post on Instagram that read that a guy is only intimidated by a woman when he knows that she deserves better. Food for thought.

2) Sometimes people are surprised by the people I date or go on dates with. I have a similar style when I dance as to when I date. I am more likely to give someone a chance, rather than outright say no. All the men I have gone out with, had at least one thing in common: they approached me or asked me out. For me to even consider talking to someone, they have to at least make it obvious to me, that they are interested in getting to know me. I have heard rumors of guys that wanted to get to know me. Those men never will know anything more about me, than what they can see with the eye, if they don't have the guts to approach me. There are guys that have very little going on for themselves, who approach me. Then there are guys who have a lot going for them, who stare silently from across the room.  I don't get it.

3) Just because I don't need you to pay my bills doesn't mean that I don't want a man to share my life with. Some men are intimidated by an independent woman, who can support herself. When my friends can take care of themselves, I'm glad. Who wants a friend that you have to pay all their bills? So why is it that some men are intimidated by a woman who lives under her means? I know one doctor who finds it liberating that his wife makes more money than he does. Wouldn't it be better for a woman to want you because she loves your company and not because she needs your money ?

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