Tuesday, December 29, 2009

Is Marriage Hype?

Would men and women really live together if there weren’t so many novels and movies and magazine articles dedicated to highlighting the joyful pleasure of heterosexual relationships? Maybe we women have all been brain-washed. Maybe it is all hype. Maybe if I had never been deluged by all the propaganda I would be perfectly fine living single and sharing moments of my life, every now and again, with my friends.  

I mean if marriage and romance were all it was crapped up to be, why would I have had several married women tell me to stay single as long as I can, or not to get married at all? It is as if there is a final chapter to the saga on love, romance and marriage that no one ever writes about. We watch these movies in which the happy ending is when the guy and the guy confess their love for one another, and they embrace and the credits roll. Our imaginations keep the story going with endless bliss and undying love. So if it is so grand a fairy-tale, why am I encouraged to prolong getting married by the older, more experienced generation? How come all the media hype leaves that side of the story out?

Until the last few years, I had no real desire for relationship or romance. So what changed? Well, I think that on top of being set up by the media, God set me up with these so-called hormones. The media brain-washing was by accident. I like girly magazines, and wedged between beautiful fashion spreads that tantalize my occular senses, are blurbs on how to make things “hot” and new sex tips and what a turns a man on. As I graze through a mag, it is so easy to casually read a few lines of the blurb. Then over the course of a year or even two years, those little seeds start to sprout fruits of desire.  Oh and I cannot forget the romance movies that I like to watch. At the end of one movie I am suddenly wanting a man that I did not want before the movie started. Lastly there are the hormones that have a mind of their own.  It is like they turn on without asking my permission and then run rampant.  

The whole thing is a divine set-up. If women did not enjoy chatting about men and hormones did not lay siege to our minds, women would not live with men---they would have no need for them. God knew that life would end after one generation if there was not some draw that entangled men and women, so God set us up. 

I say women have been brain-washed because they definitely seem to get the short end of the stick in relationships. They get the project of helping their dude be civilized, get to carry his child for nine months, plus the pleasure of pushing out it’s big head, they get to be a glorified house-keeper, cooking and cleaning and child-rearing and such.  Look how much stuff we get in return for marriage.  With that in mind, who wouldn’t want to get married? LOL.

I just thought of some more things that entangle us: fear of disease and religious principles.  Actually the two can go hand-in-hand. I have heard justification for monogamy and only having sexual relationships in marriage because it is healthier (one is less likely to get STDs). So what if there was not the fear of STDs or the rules about sex and marriage? In that world, maybe men would be in one camp and women in another. Maybe women and men would only come together for sexual recreation or for procreation. Maybe the women would keep the girl babies and give the boy babies over to the men’s camp (if not right away, maybe after thy were weaned). Either way, women would not live with men.  I bet women would live to see one hundred years and men would die in their thirties.

We have been set up. I have been set up, and I know it. Unfortunately, in this case, knowing is not half the battle. Even if I avoided all the media hype, I would still have those blasted, raging hormones. Man !

2 comments:

githoni said...

This is very honest. I must say you are asking some very interesting questions. I hope there are people out there in the world of blog, who will give you a straight answer.

Unknown said...

Well this is very funny I laughed a few times. And you know I think that one major reason 50% of marriages fail is because of all the "hype" you described. Built up by media and books.. But mostly because people in this day and age just expect things to fall into place. People have become lazy and don't want to work for anything anymore. I do feel that God intended man and woman to marry because he wanted to establish a sense of closeness and love that is almost a sample of what we will feel when we are truly close to Him. And being that Jesus tells men to love their wives as he loved the church we can conclude that the institution of marriage was meant to have a very strong connection. One that you would die for, he did after all die for the church or "his people". But it's my opinion that relationships especially marriages fail because they don't have God as their foundation. No relationship in this world has a chance of lasting without God being at the center and when you think about a relationship is pointless without God.. Another thing that confuses me is why nonbelievers marry. I mean this is an institution that was created by God. And yet countless nonbelievers participate in it. Like people who celebrate Christmas but don't believe in Christ !!! One thing I do know is that marriage is not easy. Once two people join together and make a commitment not only to eachother but an "everlasting" promise to God, Satan and his agents are hard at work to break this covenant. He blinds us with the "hype" in movies, makes us feel that marriage should be perfect and blissful and easy. Not to say it shouldn't make you happy but you're always going to have problems in this life with all of your relationships. Ones between friends, family, coworkers, and yes marriage. I mean it only makes sense. But as the sayin goes "easy come easy go"; as quick as a person is to jump Into marriage may very well determine how quick they are to jump out. And in my opinion marriage can only work, last, and be what it was Always meant to be if God is the Rock you build it on.